5 Reasons Highly Sensitive People Make Excellent Parents
Some HSPs (also known as empaths, or hypersensitivity) don’t discover their sensitivity until they become parents. Kids have a way of pushing, needing, and stimulating and their presence in our lives might be the thing that helps us put the pieces together.
But for other HSPs, you knew long before–maybe your sensitivity was (or is still) even a factor in deciding (if you got/get to decide) whether to become a parent in the first place. (If you are pregnant, check out my Highly Sensitive Pregnancy Workbook.)
There is enough noise out there about how our sensitivity makes parenting harder. And in some ways, I agree. But I actually believe that highly sensitive parents are capable of being amazing parents. I would go as far as to say that having a child (or children) can make you a better highly sensitive person, too. (I’ll elaborate on that more as the blog goes on.) Here are my top reasons for being certain that highly sensitive people can make amazing parents.
1. Empathy
You may identify as an empath… and you have plenty of empathy. No matter what stage of parenting, this will help. You can better understand how your children feel. You can coach them through their own journey of learning what to do with feelings. You can anticipate their needs. When they get older, you can truly relate. Your ability to attune is admirable.
2. Vulnerable (in a good way)
Vantage sensitivity means that we are more susceptible to the tough parts of life but it ALSO means we are more sensitive to the beautiful parts! And parenting is full of those. Your child’s first steps, hearing them blurt out that they love you, watching them form their own opinions and ideas, and helping them launch into independent adults with their own passions and purposes… it is such a privilege to watch, and your sensitivity allows you to really soak in the joy.
3. Advocacy
Many highly sensitive people are passionate about a cause–maybe the environment, social justice, animal welfare, or education. Although advocacy work usually looks different after becoming a parent, I really encourage you to keep the fire alive within yourself–for your own benefit and sense of identity, but also so your kids can see!
4. Modeling self-care
As a highly sensitive person, you know the importance of self-care. If you’re a parent already, you also know how tricky that becomes with kids. We have to get creative, sometimes thinking outside of the box. But it’s essential. Your kids are watching you (maybe a bit extra if they are also highly sensitive). Any self care you do is not only benefiting you directly, which therefore indirectly benefits your child because you are able to be a more present and regulated parent… but this is also going to show your children the lifelong importance of doing so. They will grow up knowing it’s not only okay, but vital, to care for themselves. Let the fact that they are paying attention motivate you to meditate even when you’re busy and the dishes are dirty, go get some fresh air even if you’re exhausted, indulge in a bubble bath with your favorite essential oils, or call up a friend for a chat when you need a listening ear.
5. Parenting style
Effective, proven parenting styles feel very aligned to you. Approaches like gentle parenting or respectful parenting probably just feel right to you. This is great news considering these approaches are very effective and nurture the development of children in a holistic, emotionally supportive way. These methods also feel congruent for highly sensitive people–and living life in a congruent way is correlated with more fulfillment, ease, and peace… things we all strive for.
The world truly needs people who had the gift of attuned, compassionate, effective parents. Parents like you.
I truly hope you know how lucky your kids (or future kids) are to have you as their highly sensitive parent. With the right support and lifestyle, you can thrive as a highly sensitive parent. It is absolutely worth the effort!
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